Friday 21 December 2012

Winter (picking sides).

Yes, I realize that for the first time not one but two self-made millionaires have told me to leave their presence quite harshly in the past several months. Through no fault of my own. Therefore, both came crawling back.

Case in point, Batman arriving unannounced late last evening which meant he was treated to my Hello Kitty pajamas which I put on while I brush my teeth, check the kids, boys, pets, windows and door locks and then rip off before getting into bed because the human torch and the cryogenic cowboy function as full-service climate controls.

But I digress, because Batman caved (we're taking turns), just a little over a week shy of when he said he would officially contact me in person again. Not like I care, I've been accused of minimizing Caleb's aggression on Thursday by you readers and my boys alike. Lochlan said his hands are tied and the others are attempting to teach him the difference between serious and non-serious because we appear to become upset over the wrong events while the major Oh-my-fucks sort of slip under the wire and go running across the field in the dark yelling homefree!

Oh yes they do. This is my story so I get to tell it any way I please.

Batman brought a bottle of Dom. He wanted an early toast to Christmas and then became frustrated instantly, telling me he couldn't have a serious conversation with a girl in cartoon cat pajamas.

So I deadpanned, asking him if naked worked better.

Definitely, he quipped.

Well, forget it, I reminded him. 'Tis the season for disenfranchising the Princess and all that, I told him and he frowned.

I still have a huge stake in your life here, Bridget.

No, the boys work for you or for people who are owned by you. That has little to do with me.

I only do this because of you.

Then that will be your downfall.

On the contrary. It makes for quite a drive to succeed. A necessity, as it were.

I don't need anything from you.

He does. He needs the checks. The supervision, the reminder that he is being watched.

I don't need him either.

God. Your comic cat outfit makes you downright fearless.

It's Hello Kitty. Japanese phenomenon? Pop culture icon? Jesus, Batman. Open your eyes.

You want to go to Japan? I'll take you. You'd love it-

No, I don't want to go anywhere except to bed.

He smiled and said nothing.

Oh my God. I give up. You hate my guts but you're here offering me trips and seduction. I think I'm going to go upstairs now. I'll find someone to see you out.

I can see myself out, Bridget, I just needed...to see for myself.

To see what?

That you were okay. Too many brushes with the Devil lately for my comfort.

Well then you'll be pleased to know I haven't been striving for your comfort.

Where is Ben?

You should know.

Oh, you're angry with me because of the workload? Idle hands, Bridget. You know what they are.

I also know the shenanigans of someone who uses corporate grindstones to isolate, divide and ruin, Batman.

I'm not that kind of boss, Bridget.

Like hell you aren't.