Friday 4 March 2011

On not giving in.

When I returned home, I walked straight into Lochlan's room and dumped out the contents of the bag on the desk in front of him.

What the fuck, Lochlan. You could have said something.

What did you want me to say, Bridget?

Maybe that you were serious?

Would it have made a difference? Would you be married to me if I had produced a ring? Is the ring really that fucking important?

No. I don't know. I can't think.

Right. But thankfully the rest of us still can.

I don't make decisions lightly.

So you thought real hard about sneaking out to go see him tonight. Did you touch him too, Bridge? Do you want to show your husband another set of bite marks and crush Ben just a little more?

The only one crushing people around here is you with the weight of YOUR history coming down on all of our heads. I can't even breathe anymore, Lochlan!

Whoops. Touched a nerve. He swiped his hand across the desk, taking the tiny white box in his fist and he stood up, coming around the chair to meet me face to face. He was about to say something awful I'm sure when we both realized Ben was standing in the doorway.

Hey guys.

Lochlan nods. I run over and throw myself into Ben's arms.

What's wrong.

Caleb had a ring that belonged to Lochlan that was supposed to be for me in high school.

And?

And we're fighting over why he never mentioned it.

It was fifteen years ago, bee. Let it go.

Then he kissed my head and turned and left the room.

Ben is like that sometimes. All or nothing at all. Won't give the other boys an inch but he'll give me miles and miles and miles in between.