Thursday 21 January 2010

Princess courageous and the mittens of doom.

Ben sent me this to watch since I couldn't stay awake to see it last night.

Nom nom. Awesome. They should be back in Canada by now. True North, strong and free, baby.

In other news, we're supposed to have a whole lovely bunch of wind and freezing ice pellets and snow for the next four days and so I went and filled my car up to the brim with gas and did not find winter washer fluid anywhere but I have regular so better than nothing and I bought groceries which oddly while I was shopping seemed to consist of mostly vitamin water and frozen burritos but by the time I got home all of the usual suspects were stacked in the pantry. It's very difficult to shop for three people, I believe at this point we have enough food to last until summer.

I could spend the day sitting on the pantry floor hoping nothing goes wrong, missing Ben and being awful and unmanageable. I'd LIKE to do that, God knows, everyone keeps minimizing this as if my reactionary life is completely unreasonable. Well, it isn't and I'm not, but I have things about me that don't lend well to stupid concepts like 'independence' and 'strength'. So there. Sue me. I don't do alone well. I hardly manage it at all, frankly and damned if I'm not amazingly proud of myself for going out today. Small steps.

Every last one with a tiny squeak of pain because Ben isn't within reach.

Also, I'm convinced life will be easier when it isn't mostly conducted in ice at ridiculous temperatures below zero. I plan to buy a red umbrella to stand out and maybe some cute red rain boots.

Look, distractions, princess. See them? They're right there.

I plan all kinds of things for when I get out of here, when I get to be with Ben. When things settle and we survive this most recent round of obstacles. Henry seems to be on the mend at last. Ruth has a lesser version of his cold. I have a terribly sore throat and swollen glands, hence the vitamin water. I don't drink enough unless there is coffee left. Coincidentally since I still seem to make coffee for six people every morning, there is always some left.

And I'm not going to talk about yesterday. I was cheeky and I got my hand slapped as a result. Caleb politely asked me to remove my post so I did because I don't bite the hand that feeds me. It bites me. Sometimes it hurts and so for now I'm just going to let that go for a little bit and maybe he will slither back into the shadows, under a rock somewhere like a good little snake and I can continue my walk through the shade in the forest hoping that I come across the clearing soon.

(Where the sun shines and the flowers bloom toward the sky. Where snakes wither helplessly and then they die.)

Whoops. That was out loud again, wasn't it?

I'm going to go make lunch for the children. They should be home from school any moment now.